51. Radiation Therapy - Day Two (Skopje) - 8Sept2020

Radiation - Day 2

I've been struggling to figure out the best way to express how I'm feeling today. The best analogy I can give is from the last time I went to a tanning salon - the young lady said, "We've just changed the bulbs in that unit, you might want to cut back on the time." 

 I said, "That's all right - maybe I'll actually get some color today!" Which, of course, I did - so much so that I blistered for a week. In fact, I am more than a little surprised to find myself fighting breast cancer rather than skin cancer from those days worshipping the (fake) sun rays. But I digress.... 

Getting up out of that tanning bed, I remember the SMELL very distinctly - the smell of burnt flesh. Singed hair. It just smelled very, very WRONG - and that's how I felt walking out of radiation today. As if I'd just emerged from a microwave and my insides were still cooking. 

I spent the hour long drive home with the A/C on full blast and still couldn't stop the feeling of burning. Even now, sitting at home in front of my wall unit chiller - I can't cool down. 

 It isn't painful, mind you. Not yet, anyway. The burns will increase over time and who knows how my skin will react. But it's...odd. I'm waiting for just ONE THING in 2020 to feel normal and comfortable and safe. But until that happens, I'm guess I'm okay with odd.