54. Radiation - Week #3 - More grief, and the unexpected consequences

 After burying my father last week, I started out week three completely exhausted.  I'd agreed to do some mentoring after work hours, though, so I knew there would be no rest for the weary this week.

On Tuesday night I heard that a much beloved friend had died in a tragic accident.  She'd slipped getting into the bath and knocked herself unconscious - we'd just been speaking a few days earlier, and it put me in a complete state of shock followed by 12 hours or non-stop crying.

I skipped radiation on Wednesday.  I hadn't slept a wink, I didn't want to do anything, I had a very impressive little pity party with myself.  Barbara was one of the most wonderful and genuine people I've ever met - and the most incredible artist I've ever known.  Truly.  And we'd been making plans to get together - so this was just devastating.

And in the midst of my little pity party, when I'm trying to avoid anyone and everyone - I get a video call from my friend and cancer buddy, Ben Hopkin.  He's been fighting his own battles through multiple different types of cancer and has been my inspiration and strength for this entire journey.  Again, just the kindest man you could ever hope to know - and he's calling ME from his hospital bed as he embarks on a life changing / medical journal worthy clinical trial.

He talked about his faith that he was going to make it through - and we both expressed how much love and affection we had for each other.  I think that's the one thing that cancer has taught me - no matter how confident you are in your recovery, tomorrow is never promised - eat dessert, say the things that you want to say even if you think they'll make you look stupid, take the adventure.  So it was a tear filled and wonderful conversation that I will forever be grateful for.

On Thursday, I went to my radiation appointment - still without much sleep and apparently GROSSLY dehydrated, because I fell asleep during the 10 minute treatment and when I stood up afterwards, I fainted.  Just BOOM!

And I realized afterwards - this must happen alot because they're always standing close by when I sit up and get off the table, and the one time I got off the table before they came back into the room I got yelled at.  (Liability and all)   NOW I UNDERSTAND.

I sat and drank about four bottles of water before I left, feeling foolish but absolutely fine.  I will need to monitor my water intake when the tears are flowing to be sure.

One more week down.  Two to go.